oncology Archives - The Practical Caregiver Guides

One of the most impressive women I ever met when my mother was undergoing cancer treatment was a lady who had survived two decades with the disease. How did she do it? She paid attention to her body. She got to the point where she could tell when the cancer was spreading or returning. She went in search of cancer treatment. She was not content to just accept it as her fate in life. Her husband was a supportive partner as she endured, managed, and directed her own cancer care. Why does this matter? I learned a lot from her that day as we talked in the chemotherapy room. She knew life is precious, that we are here to live life and to love. One moment in time can change a life for the better or for the worse. When we hesitate, when we accept the status quo without question, we are victims of our fate. When we accept the opportunity to learn what we can about cancer, when we begin to embrace the opportunities provided by emerging technologies, we help our loved ones to manage the disease better. Don’t close your eyes and look away because your loved one has cancer. Be proactive. Become aware of what’s available and what it can do for you and your loved one.

I’m a big believer in using technology to attack cancer and knock it out of the loop. Caris Life Sciences has a new program for cancer patients that enables better, smarter treatment:

http://www.mycancer.com/biopsy

Caris even has a checklist of questions to ask the oncologist, so that you and your love one better understand the type of cancer and the options for treatments. The idea is to individualize the cancer in order to provide the best treatment for the specific situation.

Anyone who has ever had cancer or cared for someone with cancer knows that it can be tough to withstand the rigors of treatment. Sometimes that’s harder than the cancer itself. With a more personalized treatment plan, unnecessary guesswork goes out the window. Cancer treatment is no longer “one-size-fits-all”. When oncologists and hematologists can see markers in blood that indicate cancer long before it shows up on a scan, that’s a head start on cutting cancer off at the pass. The sooner you know, the sooner you or your loved one can be treated. That means less treatment because it’s more effective at catching the cancer earlier.

One of the hardest things for cancer patients is to hope when things look bad. If your loved one has late stage cancer, you might be tempted to give up and give in. Would it help you to know that a new study showed that even late-stage cancer patients increased their survival rate by almost 30% using molecular profiling? That means that 3 out of 10 late-stage cancer patients thrived by using this technology. Three more people now live who would have died without the technology.

Any good cancer caregiver knows that working with a loved one’s radiology, oncology, and surgical team is imperative in keeping him or her healthier. It’s always important to be able to discuss the cancer and the options, because the better you and your loved one understand cancer, the better you and your loved one can manage the disease. And the better the cancer is managed, the better life will be for the whole family.

For more help with cancer caregiving, visit The Practical Caregiver Guides:
www.practicalcaregiverguides.com

For a free copy of “The Practical Caregiver’s Guide to Cancer Care: How to Help Someone You Love” in popular ebook formats, visit my Smashwords page:
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/110999

In honor of National Family Caregiver Month, I’ve invited Kathy McGonigal, an oncology-certified nurse with almost 20 years of experience to answer some questions. My goal is to help cancer caregivers do a better job of helping their loved ones manage the disease as much as is possible.

Sara:
Hi, Kathy. I’m so glad you could join us. I really value your experience as an oncology nurse. Let me ask you this. If you could give one piece of advice to caregivers at the start of treatment for their loved ones, what would that be?

Kathy:
It’s hard to give just one but I would say take care of “you”. This is the most difficult for the caregiver to understand. They feel like they have to be everything to their loved one all the time. Let others help you. Admit when you are overwhelmed. Taking a break is important. Eat healthy and get a lot of rest.

Sara:
So, so true. It really is critical that we take care of ourselves, so we can be there for the people we love. What the most common mistake you’ve seen caregivers make in taking care of loved ones with cancer? Is there more than one way to overcome this?

Kathy:
When patients hear the word cancer, everything changes. Most patients want to talk about their fears. Listen. Really listen. Instead of the usual “Don’t talk like that” or “Everything will be fine”, it is important to acknowledge their fears. It is also okay for you to tell them you are afraid too. Once words are spoken out loud, some of the fear disappears.

Sara:
I think listening is probably the best tool a caregiver can have in the caregiver tool box. It helps you to recognize when there’s a serious problem and to get the right help from your cancer treatment team. And a caregiver who is a good listener makes a cancer patient feel much more connected. It’s scary enough to hear the word, “cancer”, so knowing you have good support can make it all a little less lonely. How important is it for cancer families to understand the type of cancer their loved ones have and to understand the treatment that’s being given? Does it make a difference?

Kathy:
Families who understand the disease their loved one is suffering from is very important. You will be getting a lot of advice from other cancer survivors and caregivers. Not all cancer is created equal. Knowing what you are dealing with allows you to help make educated decisions and make reachable goals. The more educated you are, the less afraid you are.

Sara:
I think that’s really true about getting advice from other cancer survivors and caregivers. I met some amazing people during my mom’s treatments, and having the chance to talk to them about their experiences really helped me to do a better job in caring for my mom. One issue that seems to come up a lot with cancer patients is eating. Nutrition is often an important element in helping cancer patients get through the rigors of treatment. Do you have a good tip for feeding a reluctant patient?

Kathy:
Eating is important but it can also be a source of frustration between caregivers and patients. Feeding an illness is something we have all learned from our mothers. The patient knows how important it is to eat but it is not always possible. Think about how you feel when you are ill before you try and “force” your loved one to eat. Let the patient go. Make sure there are a lot of simple nutrient rich foods on hand. Cook simple so the smells are not overwhelming. Don’t make the patient feel like you are monitoring everything they eat or not eat. It will cause too much anxiety. The patient will eat when they can. Leave it up to the doctors and nurses to address nutrition.

Sara:
Ah, what could be more annoying than the Food Police? How true. That’s a good point, too, about the cooking smells, especially if your loved one doesn’t already feel well. Reaching out to the medical team for help is good, solid advice, Kathy. As an experienced oncology nurse, you’re working on the front lines and I’m sure you’ve seen a lot over the years. Dealing with cancer can be stressful on a daily basis. A lot of cancer caregivers become overwhelmed. Do you have your own favorite ways of dealing with stress when you’ve had a tough week at work?

Kathy:
Wow, that’s a hard one and it is sometimes very difficult. I try to apply everything I learn from my patients into my personal life. I try to take nothing for granted. No matter how long you live, it is always not long enough. As stressful as my job can be, I have been privileged and honored to be invited into the lives of my patients at what might be the most vulnerable time of life. They have all enriched my life in ways most people do not get to experience. It is amazing to watch the human spirit take over. If you are a caregiver, you too will learn that while the patient says they couldn’t get through it without you, you will be the one who gets the biggest gift of all. You make it possible for your loved one to fight.

Sara:
What a great point to make to caregivers. I’ve seen that time and time again. Caregivers are the wind beneath a loved one’s wings and yet we’re the ones who benefit when we really make an effort to give the right kind of support for those we love. It changes lives, especially our own. Thank you so much, Kathy, for sharing your insight and wisdom. I know caregivers will be inspired by your words.

Contact:
Kathy McGonigal
kathymcgonigal@gmail.com