It’s hard for parents to see their child in a bed,overwhelmed by cancer and its treatment. So many times, families spend their days at the hospital, watching helplessly as their loved ones get radiation, chemotherapy, and even surgery.
Usually, the disruption to family life puts a tremendous strain on everyone. The child with cancer suffers from the side effects of the treatment and from the cancer itself. The parents suffer the emotional anguish and often physical burden of having a child seriously ill. And the siblings, too, find that childhood disappears in the midst of such a grave situation.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do during this time is to stick to family routines and traditions. If you’re familiar with hospital life, you know there’s rarely a schedule that goes right.
But parents can do some things to keep the family focused, even when a child is hospitalized. Whenever possible, stick to normal routines. If your child regularly naps in the afternoon, make that a quiet time. Tell relatives and friends that is not a good time to visit. Stick to normal bedtimes as much as you can. Half an hour or so before your child normally hits the sack, turn off the TV. Remind your child to brush his or her teeth. Read some stories together. Help your child to settle down for the night.
To many parents, it may sound strange to have your child follow routines when seriously ill, but the truth is it can provide a sense of security during a stressful time. Structure and routine tell your child everything is “normal” and that you’re still in charge of their lives in a positive way.
It’s also good for you. Sitting in a hospital, day after day, is emotionally and physically exhausting. When you keep family routines going, it allows you to have some control over your life. You’re making parental decisions for your child. The doctors and nurses will make the medical ones. As much as it is difficult for you to watch your child go through cancer treatment and deal with the side effects, you need some structure and routine as well.
Engaging your child in play is another way that parents can help their children. Play allows a child to release stress and anxiety that builds up during the day. Whether you challenge your child to a game of cards or to draw a special picture together, you are showing your child you still believe in him or her.
Sometimes the hardest part of cancer treatment is to leave it behind for a little while and just have some fun. Laughter can lighten the heart and opportunities to learn and have fun can help a cancer patient feel more normal again. They feed the soul. As a parent, you still have power to help your child in very positive ways. Use it wisely and appreciate it for what it is.
For ideas, tips, and activities for children with cancer, visit my websites:
THE PRACTICAL CAREGIVER’S GUIDE FOR SICK KIDS STUCK IN BED
https://sites.google.com/site/thepracticalcaregiversickkids/
BARKLEY AND RUFFUS MCDILLY’S GUIDE — HELPING SIBLINGS COPE WITH A CHILD’S SERIOUS ILLNESS
https://sites.google.com/site/barkleyandruffusmcdillysguide/